by Erin Steiner.
The other night I was making dinner when, from the other room, I heard my boyfriend say “Welcome to Warsong Gulch.” I paused, halfway bent into the oven and thought to myself, “Why do I know that name?” I flipped through my mental rolodex of places that it might be but couldn’t find a visual to match. I knew I’d heard that name before and the words brought up a vaguely Chernobyl-ish picture, but I knew that had to be wrong. I must have stood there for a good fifteen minutes, driving myself crazy, trying to figure out where on the planet Warsong Gulch was located. After all, if the name was so familiar, there must be a reason. Finally, I went into the other room and asked my boyfriend “Where is Warsong Gulch?”
Turning around, and looking at me with what can only be described as an incredulous look on his face, he said “Um. It’s a place on my game?” His voice said “how the heck do you know about Warsong Gulch?”
“Are you kidding?” I demanded, pointing my salad tongs at him.
“No.”
“Are you kidding?!?” I asked again.
“No.”
“Well that’s just…. I can’t….. You play that game way too much!” I finally said, flinging my hands up in the air and sending spots of salad dressing onto the walls and ceiling.
“Why did you want to know anyway?” He asked.
“I heard you say ‘Welcome to Warsong Gulch’ from the kitchen and I’ve been trying to figure out where on the planet that is because it sounded so familiar!”
That’s where my boyfriend started to laugh at me. Hard. I went back to the kitchen, feeling really stupid.
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years. We met through work, had a mostly online “getting to know each other” chatting period (woo! MSN!), he failed to mention that he was a Gamer. Sure, he played the odd game of Counter Strike and often participated in Magic and D&D Tournaments, but it wasn’t until we’d been together for about six months that he sat down in front of EverQuest.
“I used to be really into this game, but I promise I won’t get as into it as I used to.”
True to his word, he wasn’t as into it as he had been before we met. He saved that for World of Warcraft, which he started playing a couple of months later. That was two years ago. And now I’m starting to think of the places in the game as real places because I’ve heard them mentioned so often.
Here’s what you need to know if you’re going to date a Gamer, especially one that tells you right off the bat “I play World of Warcraft” or any other role playing game. Role playing games? Can’t be paused. There is no putting it down and coming back to it later. That means your plans will get scheduled around the plans of the game. You will also quickly learn to just call most of the details on his game “thing.” It only takes a few scathing looks for using the word “raid” when you should have said “instance” to just give up completely. It is never okay to laugh out loud at his friends’ ideas of what they’d do if they had a girlfriend. Most of them haven’t ever dated. On the flip side of that, the less fuss you make about his Gaming, the cooler you will be to all of his friends. (Or her friends. There are girl gamers too!)
There are good things too: You get to keep a strong sense of independence. You’ll be so independent there will be times when you’ll feel single again. But you won’t ever hear him complain if you want to go off and do your own thing. It means more time on his game! You also never have to fight over what to watch on television. He’s too busy in Gameland to care what you’re watching, which means: you get sole control over the remote. Just make sure you have another television if he brings home a Wii.
There are two rules to follow when dating a Gamer: 1) Accept that the Game comes first. In the event that you want to stomp your feet and demand that the Game come second (or twelfth), there is rule 2) The Game really does come first. Embrace your committed independence and go see a movie with some friends! You didn’t really want to listen to him complain about your movie choice anyway, right?
About the author: Erin is a Blogger (She’s been blogging since January 2004) and freelance writer. She currently lives in Oregon with her long time (Gamer) boyfriend. When she’s not trying to get him to “turn off that blasted game” she can be found writing, watching television and hanging out with her cat. She harbors a love of musicals and all things Aaron Sorkin. In spite of spending most of her life trying, she has never learned to like cheese. You can read about her adventures on her blog, Snarke.Net
