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For those of you who do not read the Wall Street Journal on a regular basis (don’t feel badly reading is generally overrated) there was a very interesting cover story yesterday about the current situation in Zimbabwe with Mr. Mugabe and his ever so ingenious economic policy.

The current rate of inflation in Zimbabwe is 1 million percent! Put another way 1,000,000% or, ONE MILION PERCENT!! That means that if you have 10,000 dollars this year you will have $1 next year.

Let’s put that in a bit of perspective. All things being equal (which they so rarely are and most certainly are not at the current moment) if the US dollar suffered the same inflation rate a can of CocaCola would cost about $10,000 next year.

Now obviously it takes some very smart people with some very advanced degrees in economics to understand that the solution to this is for the government to print more money and yet again increase the supply of currency. (When supply increases sharply the price goes up right?…) So at this point there are notes flying around Zimbabwe in denominations like $250,000,000, $1,000,000,000 and even $50,000,000,000!!

Zimbabwe Dollar

All told $50B Zimbabwe dollars are worth about $1,000 American. So I think it is only appropriate that we at the blog of human failure start measuring our personal wealth in Zimbabwe Dollars. It might not be much but I am finally a billionaire!!! In fact, I am so gaudy I have spent $1 Billion Dollars on lunch before.

So now the plan is to get as many Zimbabwe notes as possible and start spending like a maniac. Here are some things I would do with $1B (Zimbabwe dollars);

1) buy a 750 ml bottle of Jack Daniels

2) take a taxi from my apartment in midtown to LaGuardia airport

3) Eat 4 $250,000,000 Subway sandwiches

4) Take my girlfriend to a movie, although it will have to be a matinee because I will want popcorn and we are trying to stick to a budget here

5) Eat 20 hot dogs

6) Burn it… just for the fun of saying I burned $1B dollars

What would you do with your billion dollars?


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